Since moving to Boston a few weeks ago, my life no longer consists of paragraph sized quirky experiences and life lessons. It's now just one big run-on sentence of completely mind boggling weirdness. However, I think a lot of my problems out here could be solved, or prevented with a simple T-shirt design that says:

"I don't drink coffee or alcohol. I don't have sex. No, really."

If I had a shirt like that, I would wear it with a little ruffled mini skirt, because that's what all the kids are wearing out here and a trucker hat that says, "The Red Sox? They're a basketball team, right?"

Other T-shirt ideas include:

"I'm lost."
"I only talk to people who go to Worcester State."
"I always wondered what I'd look like with really really frizzy curly hair."

Everyone here thinks I'm from the South, even though I tell them I'm from Utah. To New Englanders, every other state IS the South or California. But then I remember that I can drive across their tiny little state in like a half an hour, and it makes me feel better.