Today I had some problems using my card at the gas station. I tried no less than 300 hundred billion times to swipe my card and it wouldn't work. Finally Conoco took pity on me and sent out an attendant. I was completely grateful for the help of the dirty, greasy 50-year-old man. He took hold of my card, licked the magnetic strip with his bare tongue, and swiped it. Which immediately caused me to think, "Do you know where that card's been?" However, when he handed me back my card, I thought about how willing he was to lick a complete stranger's visa card, and wondered how often he has done this. Maybe it's the only thing he does all day. So when he handed me my card, I thought, "Um do I know where that tongue has been?"